I am fascinated

On my way home from work everyday for the past few months, there have been flocks upon flocks of birds circling over New Circle Rd at the Richmond Rd. exit. It is amazing, there must be thousands of birds circling around that particular intersection. It looks like there are several different "families" or flocks converging at this one place on their way to a warmer climate. Every day they move just a few feet down the road. They circle and circle and then all try to land on the same small spot of telephone pole. There are usually 3 or 4 different flying circles going on at once. All of a sudden they dive toward their landing spot and all try to squeeze in. There are so many flying at once sometimes, it makes the sky darker for a second. It truly amazes me. I look forward to the long red light just so I can watch them. Of course, I finally remember to grab a camera to take a picture and they have moved on. I will miss them! Hopefully they will stop again on their way back up north.
The Fam Damily is doing well. The Saint is having a birthday next week. What shall I get him???
Whatever is trying to eat me out of house and home. She is now boycotting sandwiches for her lunch. So she rifles through our cabinets to find the most "unsandwichy" thing she can. Today it was 7 slices of pepperoni, some graham cracker sticks, and a banana. Ok. Why is a peanut butter sandwich not good enough? It was for me.
The Bug is a mess. She is still nursing but really stuffed up! So she nurses for awhile then pulls away quickly to gasp for air. It is funny and no I am not trying to smother her. Her favorite things are cheese, shoes, bananas, and cookies. These are all words she loves to say and knows she can get results when she says them.
So I am flying with her (15 months old!) on my lap, by myself, on a packed airplane. Jealous? She is an angel but something tells me this might be an abbreviated version of hell! She does not like to sit still anymore and nursing her down is pretty hard in a confined space like that. It will be interesting!

TTFN
~A~

A task relinquished........

One thing I hate above all others is taking Whatever shopping. Not just grocery shopping or window shopping but the kind of shopping where you HAVE to buy something like a winter coat or school clothes. For me it is a nightmare. Whatever needed jeans, she had none. I mentioned this to her father, The Saint, he said he would take her. Huh? Come again? OK, go for it! This would have taken us 4 hours, 3 heated arguments, 2 storming offs, and 1 episode of tears from either her, myself, or the baby. So off they went together to Target to buy jeans. I lectured her on the "if you can bend over and I can see your butt crack you can't ahve them" rule. I lectured him about her plan "to wear him out so he says yes to anything". An hour later I called to check up on them, expecting to her screaming in the background. He says, "we're done, I am at my Moms". An hour?!?!?!? How does one take and eleven year old shopping for jeans and complete the task in under an hour?!?!?!? I am visioning low riders, studded with rhinestones, fringed with the butt cheeks cut out. What did he get her? Two pairs of identical Levi's. They fit great and she and I both like them. Go figure. Guess who is taking her shopping from now on? Phew.

Ashes, ashes, we all fall down...............

The Bug wanders around singing "ashes, ashes" now. Her sitter does Ring Around The Rosie with her and she loves the ashes part. It is too cute. Creeps The Saint out, though. He is convinced that the song originates from the Bubonic Plague. "Ring around the rosie" is the red ring rash that people got, "pocket full of posey" is because people carried herbs and flowers to keep the bad smell away, "ashes ashes, we all fall down" refers to people dying and being cremated. I looked on Wikipedia and the theory has been debunked but he is not convinced, he got it on a better authority (The History Channel) that it is true. So he cringes every time she sings "ashes, ashes". To me it is hysterical, only I would have a baby that liked the word ashes, not dolly, not baby, not mommy, she chooses ashes! Oh yeah and MINE!

I LOVE Halloween!

I took the girls to a Halloween party this weekend and they had a blast! The Bug wore her costume all night. Whatever was a Goth Girl. I really think she was just using it as an excuse to wear make-up. I took her to Goodwill to find an outfit and she was having none of it. She wanted leggings and black lipstick. That's it, nothing more. I give her a $5 budget just to spark her creativity and she only wants leggings and black lipstick! These are things she wanted even before Halloween. I used to come up with the craziest costumes for myself. I was a table, a cracker jack box, a bloody prom queen, Princess Lea. Mom and I would make my costumes on a very tight budget. I used Halloween as an excuse to step outside myself and be someone or something else. Whatever wants to be herself with makeup! Oh well, we can't make our kids into mini versions of us, right?

The Bug ran and ran all night on Saturday. She had so much fun at the party. She found a Trick or Treat bag with Mickey and Donald on it and fell in love. She held it and talked to it and kissed it. She wanted to carry it all night. Too bad it was connected to a little girl that was VERY preturbed at The Bug. She thought Bug wanted all of her candy but all she really wanted was to have a little time with the bag! We finally found on that was similar laying on the floor so she carried it around all night, stopping occasionally to lay it on the floor and tell it what was going on in her baby talk.

The Bug now likes her Ladybug costume. She wants me to help her put it on and take it off continually. She hands it to me, puts her arm out, slides it on, wants me to help her put the hood up, giggles, grabs at the hood, desperatly tries to rip it off, puts in on the floor, giggles, picks it back up and starts the process all over again. That's my girl..............

I am having an issue with the mother of one of Whatever's classmates. She keeps calling to get homework that her daughter has missed. She asks details that I just don't know because...IT'S NOT MY HOMEWORK!!! She wants to know what Whatever thought of the handout and if Whatever understood the packet. It is almost as if she is doing this homework for her kid. She called last night and left a message in a panic over some stuff. Now I do keep up online of Whatever's grades and I can tell if she has missed anything. As far as I am concerned, I did 7th grade, no need to do it again. Whatever is responsible for her work, if she messes up or misses something, she needs to suffer the consequences. I spent some time with both mother and daughter for a project 2 years ago. We met at the library and I left Whatever and the friend in the kids section with their materials and went to do my own thing (the mother had to run an errand). I didn't go far but let them do it themselves. I went to check on them and this mother was sitting there typing their paper!!! Not just what they had wrote, but adding her own ideas too. What good is this for your kid? This girl is 13 and acts like she is 5.

Oh well.....it's raing here, has been for two days. I want to curl up and snuggle in the bed with my Bug. Guess I will get some work done instead.

In the bag...........

The Bug getting a ride from

The Saint in an LL Bean bag.

This too shall pass....

My new mantra.
Whatever won't be a middle schooler forever, she will grow up. Man, she is going to take us for a ride until that happens! No details necessary, she is just wearing us out! She would much rather risk punishment than ask permission. The teen years are going to be hell.
This too shall pass..........
To top an already bad week off, my cat peed in the bed this morning. Right by The Bug's head! I spent the morning chasing her down and rubbing her nose in it. She is old and moody and when she gets mad she gets even. The Bug thought all of the hubub was pretty darn funny and Whatever was just happy my anger was not directed at her for once. I broke my broom, trying to get her out form under the bed.
This too shall pass.........
I answer phones at my work and lately we have had a plethora of hang up calls. I drives me nuts. I hate answering phones anyway but to rush to pick it up and have no one there, well that might just be what puts me in the home. Why do I answer phones for a living when I absolutely hate the sound of a ringing phone?? Money.
This too shall pass..........
Alright, whine session over, the phones are ringing..........................

So Whatever has a dress code at her school. Naturally she is trying to push it at all times. I have to inspect her every morning. Flashback to the second day of school this year. She is wearing her school clothes and on top of them she has one of her summer tops. Now why would there be a dress code if the kids were allowed to just put what they really wanted to wear on top of everything?!?! She told me it got cold in school, that is why she has to wear this light weight short sleeved shirt on top of her collared shirt. Makes sense to me! I told her to take it off. So today she tries to pull the same trick with the same clothes and the same excuse!! I told her no. She says to me "but you told me I could wear it when it got cold out and it is FREEZING this morning." Huh? I have to sit for a minute and try to figure out if it was crack or heroine that I was smoking when I told her that. Then I realized that I probaby said that it was way too hot to layer clothes like that when we originally had this discussion on the second day of school. In 12 year oldese, that translates to "give it another shot when it gets colder, see if she notices".

I just want to know when I became "That Mom". The one that is constantly nagging her kid to clean her room, checking her backpack for contraband or notes from school that "forget" to make their way into my hands, confiscating makeup, the one that awlways has to say NO. I want to be a cool Mom sometimes. I have told her that if she gets good grades, she can dye her hair, peirce her nose, whatever. She gets ok grades but not good enough to warrant all that!
Oh well, it is more important that we both survive the tween years than that she likes me.

Bead For Life

I am very excited! I belong to a Mom's Group at my church (Unitarian Universalist Church of Lexington). We are participating in a Craft Fair next month and have to decided (because of my suggestion!) to set up a table with stuff from Bead For Life (www.beadforlife.org). I have been wanting to have a reason to work with them for a long time now. I just love the idea of this group. They are woman in Uganda that make beads from recycled paper and sell them. They use to proceeds to help themselves get out of poverty and to help each other. They have been able to educate their children, set up savings accounts, and build houses for themselves. I am so happy! If you are in Lexington, KY on November 17 or 18 stop by the church on Clays Mill Rd.

Whatever is grounded from a field trip. I feel horribly bad about it but she has got to learn a lesson. The only way she ever seems to learn lessons is the hard way. She keeps losing and forgetting to bring home paperwork from school. Her midterms, permission slips, PTA communications. She is so blase about it. She has got to learn. I hate that she misses out on the fun stuff, though.

The Bug still hates her costume! I think she is going to have PTSD from me showing it to her!
She does however, like "Nanas" She wants to eat them all the time. You can't even say the word or pass them at the grocery without her having a fit for one.

Halloween

So I got this great idea to have Bug be a ladybug for Halloween. I got all excited. I found a really cute ladybug vest with furry, polka dotted wings and antennae on the hood. I had all these plans to make a red tutu with black polka dots, it was going to be so cute!! I had visions of her running around with her wings flapping and tutu twirling. I get home and get it out to show her. She looks at it, shrieks, turns away and keeps shaking her head like she is trying to shake the image out of her brain. Is a 13 month old supposed to have that strong of an opinion??? So everyone keeps telling me to just leave it laying around the house and she will get used to it. I really don't think so. She looked at it this morning and shook her head and shrieked again. Luckily I got it from a consigment store and am not out too much money. I figure if she keeps hating it, I will just slip it on the toilet since that is her newest source of fascination, opening the lid and slamming it down, splashing her little hands in it, trying to flush it. That will keep her away! Of course, I have to think about potty training. I don't want a toddler that is scared of the toilet when I need her to do businees in it!!!
So now I have to rethink Halloween!

God, I am fat!

The Bug has an official lovey and here they are together! A monkey named Bubbie. She named him herself. I had an imaginary firend when I was little, a purple monky that sat on my shoulder named Saulie Aundrew. No clue where the name came from. I might google it just to see what comes up. He was a good friend to me! My friend growing up had two imaginary friends they were twins named Boy and Girl. I remember one time all of us going to the store with my mother. As we get started on the way home my friend starts crying because we left Boy and Girl behind. He goes into hysterics. My mother looks back and says "they better be waiting out front when we go back". She pulls to the front of the store, throws the door open and yells, "get your butts in the car right now Boy and Girl!".
No telling what the people standing out front thought!


So I see some pictures of myself my brother took while he was in for a quick visit. I have let myself go! I need to lose weight, get my hair cut, and generally take better care of myself. Of course, he posts them on his web site! I am so embarrassed! I am the most unphotogenic person in the world even when I am made up. Diet starts today.


Poor Bug has a cough. She does not seem slowed down by it so I am not overly concerned but I am going to call the doctor. She has had it for a week now and The Saint is concerned. He is funny. He inspects her on a regular basis, much like he would a new car. He pick s her up and looks her over from head to toe. Checks every little scratch, and there are quite a few at any given time. The cough is driving him nuts. Why he can't call the doctor, I have no idea. Why can't men do that? Is it a short in their wiring?

Picking your battles

How do you decide which ones are worth fighting? Whatever is wearing me out. She gets in trouble for breaking a rule and is doing the same thing again within 24 hours. She was supposed to bring her mid terms home 2 weeks ago, still waiting, we ask her every night. This morning I hit my breaking point. She keeps disobeying the same rule over and over. It doesn't matter what we do, she won't listen. We have taken stuff of hers that means something to her. We have grounded her, nothing works. She sneaks and lies to us. She never tells a straight story, even when she won't get in trouble. I know I am a control freak and I have to get a grip on myself but she is about to drive me crazy. I am at the end of my rope with the girl.
As I am typing this, she is on the phone asking me for money to go on a field trip to the pizza-entertainment-complex-hellhole-place. WHAT!?!?! Seriously?
A nice little trip to the nut house would do me good right now.

Diaper hat game

So I started this game with the Bug. She has recently discovered her girl parts and likes to sneak a reach when I change her diapers. I invented the diaper hat game to make her reach in another direction. I put a diaper on her head and say "why do you have a diaper on your head? You are so silly!" when she reaches up to take it off, I real quick wipe up what I can. If I need more time I put it back and talk about how silly she is for having a diaper for a hat. She giggles and grabs it. Well apparently it isn't just a game for the changing table anymore! I turned around when I was cooking yesterday and this is what I found. LOL! Wonder if she does this with the sitter and if the sitter is convinced I am quite nuts, yet. It is only a matter of time.

Ode To My Breast Pump

We have spent so much time together
It is with little sorrow that I bid you adieu
You pumped and sucked
Till by nipples turned blue

We sat on the toilet
Of my bathroom at work
Making milk for my baby
Till she could eat from a fork

Now she is growing
More and more everyday
She can drink milk that’s not mine
So I can put you away

We were quite connected once
You went everywhere with me
To keep my breast from engorging
And to help feed my little baby


Though I won’t need you again
I will miss you a lot
You were there through it all
Whether I wanted you or not

Late night escapades with The Bug!

Last night I put Bug into bed, she was sound asleep (and yes, for those that know me, in OUR bed!). She was smelling so sweet from her bath, warm and snugly. I very quietly began to unwrap an ice cream sandwich. She shot up like a turkey thermometer! She looked at me with those sleepy little eyes and grinned so big. So of course she and I shared the late night snack and of course she got a little sugar rush! She then proceeded to blow sloppy raspberries on my stomach and make me laugh. The more I laughed the tighter she locked on to my stomach. We were both laughing hysterically. I know, I know, I shouldn't have let her eat the ice cream or kept her up late but it was a moment to treasure! Just the both of us with the dim light of the bathroom, a little secret. I get so sad to think that she won't be my little Bug forever.

Stroll down memory lane

The very fist pic of my Bug!

Toddler time

So this is how we clean the kitchen. Mommy does the dishes, Bug empties the cabinet. Mommy picks up the stuff all over the floor, Bug gets into the fridge. Mommy goes to close the fridge, Bug goes back to the cabinet and empties it again! Lather, rinse, repeat.

New Digital Camera!

Woohoo! I can post pics as soon as I learn how to work the damn thing.
Let me share the deal I got,
Walgreen's has some of their Polaroid Digital Cameras on clearance. I got mine for 50.99. Good deal gets better, there isa $30 store rebate on it! A digital camera for 20.99! Can't beat that with a stick.

Whatever is trying to be sick today. She has a sore throat and sniffles, as we all do with the weather so screwy. She is notorious for faking sick. She used to be able to have her grandparents come and pick her up at the drop of a dime if she so much as sniffled. This morning she was really trying to sound like she had lost her voice, it was kind of funny because she would forget halfway through then remember again! She is under stict instruction not to call anyone unless she is bleeding, puking, or sweating from a fever of over 101.

The Bug can now shake her head "no" and is getting good at it, too good!

Busy Weekend!

Took Bug to her first protest at Applebee's. There was a great turnout!
http://www.kentucky.com/211/story/171548.html

Went to a wedding Saturday night. Bug RAN all over the place. I have learned that it is impratical to wear heels with a toddler (yes, she is offically a toddler!). I ran all over the place trying to keep up with her and trying to keep her from smacking her head on the concrete floor.
Whatever got all dressed up, hse looked so beautiful. SHe was the guestbook attendant. Baby-Daddy's band played the even so both the girls got to see him play. They LOVED it. Bug clapped and bounced and Whatever got to sing with him. She was on cloud 9.

I wish I could post pictures but we got water in the digital and it will not work. I have been buying disposable cameras but God only knows when I will get them developed. I have rolls of film from 2002 still on my dresser.

My latest conversation with Whatever:

W: Are you going to take a shower cause I was going to if you don't.
Me: No problem, I wasn't planning on it anytime soon so go ahead and take a shower.
W: But I don't want to take a shower! (rolls her eyes at me and has that"God, you are stupid" tone)
Me: (very confused look on my face!)

WTF?!?!?!

The breastfeeding controversy

Here in Lexington, there is a big shit storm over a woman that was asked to stop nursing at Applebee's.
http://www.kentucky.com/454/story/161993.html#recent_comm
I have friends that are trying to get me to speak out about my experience and stage more nurse-ins (some even suggested all of us going into the pool area and squirting breastmilk into it!). I have written letters to the pool director, La Leche, and Senator Tom Buford. I choose to wait and see what their response is before I call in the lactivists. It was one person who asked me to stop, not the establishment. I want them to be educated, not picketed. I don't want to shove anything down anyone's throats, I just want an apology for my embarrassment and to be assured that another woman won't have to be embarrassed. I do have a legal right to feed my baby and as far as covering up or feeding her in the bathroom, both are absurd!
I choose to fight my battle quietly, Brooke Ryan is calling in the big guns. I support her 100% and plan to be at the Nurse-In.

That being said:
Bug turns 1 on Saturday!! Holy crap where does the time go. Whatever turns 12! God help us all. we are having a huge bash, carnival theme. Should be big fun.

Conversation this morning with Whatever:
me: DO you have socks on?
W: uh-huh
Me: let me see
W: why?
Me: because you have told me yes before and didn't have them on, let me see
W: GAWD! Here, see.
Me: you don't have any socks on.
W: oh, I thought I had some on.

Got kicked out of the pool!

OK, as The Saint would tell you, I am being dramatic. I was asked not to breastfeed IN the pool. Very nicely by the pool manager. Apparently I was offending other swimmers. I am not one of those militant lactationistas, I didn't create a scene, I politely covered up. Since I have the guilt of working and sending The Bug to the sitter I nurse her whenever and wherever we are when we are together. I love it. Not only am I able to nourish my child, I can lob out a boob in public! I love lobbing out boobs! I digress. I can see both sides and I am sure other mothers don't want their prepubescent sons to see my ta-tas. But good golly miss molly, have you seen some of the VERY large women that squeeze into VERY tiny bikinis???? Tell me what is more offensive. I am discreet. I would cover up if The Bug would let me but she doesn't like to have her face covered. And if it was a matter of breastmilk in the pool, how many of those kids running around actually take a minute to use the facilities? Not many. I did get a little poetic justice, someone left a floater, they had to evacuate and drain the pool. Ha!

Bug Concentrating REAL HARD!

This is new. My father does this when he is deep in thought!

My trash digger

The Bug sits right up when she wakes up. Kind of like the temperature thing on the Thanksgiving turkey, just pops up. It is funny and sweet, she smiles and giggles, too. If she has had enough sleep, she is raring to go, if not, she flops about like a fish out of water. Luckily this morning she was up and alert. We get ready for our day. My other daughter, Whatever, was already off to school. As I am packing us up, I throw away half a banana. The Bug looks up at me at me with an inquisitive look on her face and says "Na-Na?" Awwww. So cute. I say "yes, Na-na, good Bug". She knows what a banana is and can point it out in a crowd, I am so proud! So I go back to my business. I turn to check on her and she has gotten the banana out of the trash and is attempting to eat it. Now what do you think I did? It still had the peel on it and had only been there for a few minutes and, Christ, she said the word and pointed it out. I peeled it down to the part that wasn't touching the trash and broke off a piece and fed it to her. I know, I know, it was in the trash! It hadn't been there for more than 30 seconds and she was so damn cute pointing at it and calling it by name. I am a trash Mom.
Oh, I also sent her to the sitter with a margarine container and some action figure that I have never seen before.
She was just too cute sitting there with a mouth full of trash banana banging Shark Boy on the plastic tub. I didn't want to piss her off!

My First Blog!

So I am jumping on the blog bandwagon! I have read so many interesting blogs that I am inspired to create my own. I can't promise brilliance, I can't promise it will be updated regularly. Let's just see how it goes............