Ahhh, the 80's!!

I was going through my old pictures, looking for ones with my grandfather in them and I found this....

I think it speaks for itself!

Isaac Stanton Richardson

My grandfather passed away yesterday. I will truly miss him. His health had been slipping and he was in a nursing home. I know he is in a better place but I wish I had one more visit, one more hug, one more story about his horse racing days........

He got to meet Bug and Whatever and we had closure on our rocky relationship so I am able to say goodbye with love and peace in my heart.

He is free from his failing body and he can finally take a nice deep breath................

Why oh why?

So why is it that you give a toddler a sippy cup full of fresh ice water and they throw it on the floor but when you put them in the tub they guzzle down dirty bath water like they hadn't had a drink in a week?

Coversations with Whatever

Last week
W: I think I am going to be a vegetarian now
me: That's great. We will have to be creative and figure out meal ideas for you since the rest of us aren't. You can't just eat cheese pizza and macaroni and cheese. You will have to eat a lot more vegetables.
W: You know I don't do vegetables, jeez.
me:The whole point of vegetarianism is that it is a plant based diet, VEGEtarin, VEGEtable, get it?
W: rolls her eyes, makes some sort of sound with her throat and walks off

Saturday
me:I'm going to Target and Meijer, anyone need anything?
W: I have a big extra credit project, I need to go to Michael's and get brown paint, popsicle sticks, and glue sticks for the glue gun.
me: does it have to be today? can we do it some other time.
W: I need to get started on it! Gawd!
me:ok
So her grandmother ended up taking her for some bonding time.
She was off Monday for President's Day so she went to her birth moms house.
me: take your project stuff since you have the whole day to do it and get it done. That way you won't have to stress about it.
W: why? It isn't due until the end of the month.
me: then why you HAVE to have the stuff this weekend?
W: I just wanted it.
UUGHH!!!!

How did I get here?!?!?!

I have been in a very reflective state of mind lately. Well, actually, since The Bug was born 17 months ago. Time flies.
JOB - i have a very strong aversion to my job. I work with conservative Christians. They are arrogant enough to assume that everyone is Christian and it is the only way. Not one person has ever asked me about my faith, they just assume. God is brought into my workplace daily. I am not 100% offended, I do believe in God. The difference is that I beleive that "mighty God is a living man" and we are responsible for how we treat eachother and the earth. Afterlife schmafterlife, I strive to make this life a paradise.
I digress. I have been at this job for 5 years and only liked it for about 8 months. I have been told that I am where they want me so I have no room for advancement. I have very little responsibility. Sounds great? Not really, I sit at the front desk day in and day out answering phones, filing stuff, and surfing the net. I am bored, I have told the higher ups and they keep telling me they will find more stuff for me. WHat do I get, anything anyone else does not want to do. I am the office grunt.
Why do I stay? Because I have become complacent. I am used to it all. I have good flexibility to leave if a kid is sick or take a half day if I am not feeling well. I can spend my day updating blogs, sending emails, researching feng shui, checking Perez Hilton, and getting my grocery lists together. SOunds great right? NO! I am better than this. I can do so much more. I am wasting my talents. I am not serving the world.
I have a dear friend in India who is giving me career counseling via IM. Of cousrse, while I am at work (when else would I have time?). Maybe he can help me make some headway.
HOME - Home is good. Anyone that knows me knows I dont divulge too much about my relatioship with my husband. We are good, could be better, marraige is hard work. Nuff said.
Whatever in my challenge in life. SHe doesn't listen, she is doing poorly in school, she drives me batty. I am so not the parent I want to be with her. She came with a lot of baggage and it has been a hard road for us. I don't blame her but man, she is a challenge! I want to be the parent that has all the kids over and has sleepovers and make s brownies and has food fights. She is a kid that if you give her an inch, she takes 5 miles. I have a friend that believes in "gentle parenting" and is constantly bringing that up withme. Makes me want to scream! I would LOVE to gentle parent but she only responds to absolutes and consequences. It is so hard!
The Bug is great! She makes me laugh REALLY hard every day. She makes all the bad stuff seem so trivial. I don't want to give the impression that I love her more than Whatever. I love her differently because I gave birth to her but she and Whatever are in two different places. It is so easy to love a baby, a tween is a bit harder. A full time step-tween? God give me strength!
A converstaion I had with The Saint last night:
me: "The Bug didn't get my dimples, what a shame"
him: "she got every bit of your whackiness, though"

There is hope!

Happy Valentine's Day!!

The Complete Dora The Explorer Box Set - $14.99

Kickin boots - $4 (end of season sale!)

Having a pot to pee-pee in - Priceless!

Quote from the Dalai Lama

If we unbalance Nature, human kind will suffer. Furthermore, we must consider future generations: a clean environment is a human right like any other. It is therefore part of our responsibility towards others to ensure that the world we pass on is as healthy as, if not healthier than we found it.

Let's all try to be better!